Toonscripts (Dutch) About

Shopping, Mansplained

Starting dialogue for this toonscript: Can I see your shopping list? Why?

 
 
May I see your shopping list?
 
 
What?
 
 
The shopping list. The one your husband made for you.
 
 
I wrote it my—
 
 
Madam, please. There are people waiting in line behind you!
The WOMAN turns around, begrudgingly hands over a piece of paper.

The CASHIER studies the paper and starts checking the contents of the shopping basket.

 
 
Baby formula. (Holds it up) Are you sure you have the right one?
 
 
Yes.
 
 
How old is your child?
 
 
Thirteen months.
 
 
Are you sure?
 
 
(Baffled)You're asking me if I am sure?
 
 
(Looks up at her)Can I speak to your husband?
 
 
What?
 
 
Can you please call your husband for me?
 
 
Why?
 
 
Call him.
 
 
He's at work now, he is in an important meeting.
 
 
Well, in that case, I can't let you have these groceries, madam.
The WOMAN furiously grabs her mobile from her purse, calls someone and hands the phone over to the CASHIER
 
 
Yes, hello?

I'm a cashier at Ballmart.(Pause)Yes.
I have a woman in front of me who wants to buy baby formula number three. Is that correct? (Pause) And a sixpack of beers, but I don't see it on the shopping list. Can she have these?

 
 
But—
 
 
Ah, right. They're for you. She chose Dudweiser, is that right? (Pause) Okay. I see she also bought shampoo, peach—yes—okay. and I see spaghetti, does it have to be multigrain? (Pause)Aha. Right.

No. The rest looks good.

Oh, wait!

Minced meat. She chose pork. Does it have to be low fat beef instead?

Doesn't say on your shopping list.

 
 
Oh, did she write—ah, okay.

Okay.

Yes, thank you.

The CASHIER hands the phone back to the WOMAN and starts to tally up the bill.
 
 
(In her phone)Honey?
 
 
That will be twenty nine dollars and seven cents.
The WOMAN looks at the groceries, picks them up one by one and inspects them.
 
 
Madam! There are people waiting behind you.
 
 
(In her phone)Honey, did you know that there even was such a thing as multigrain spaghetti? And low fat beef minced meat! Wow!
 
 
Twenty nine dollars and seven cents.
 
 
(Turns to read the packaging of an item)Who'd have thought that Í had prepared Spaghetti Bolognese so, so incredibly wrong over all these years! Multi grain! Low fat!
 
 
Madam!
 
 
Gosh...(Looks at )How much did you say?
 
 
Twenty nine dollars and seven cents.
 
 
Are You Sure?

THE END

Text and illustrations: Ayal Pinkus, April 13th, 2022